


The Stars Within You

by arcticfox007



Series: Cas and Dean (Destiel) December 2020 Challenge [15]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Angel Lore (Supernatural), Angel Wings, Castiel Loves Dean Winchester, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Dean Winchester Loves Castiel, Fluff, Love Confessions, M/M, Sam is mentioned, Wingfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-31
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:35:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28453971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arcticfox007/pseuds/arcticfox007
Summary: Castiel finally gives Dean his Christmas present and it means much more than Dean expected.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Series: Cas and Dean (Destiel) December 2020 Challenge [15]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2036836
Comments: 5
Kudos: 89





	The Stars Within You

**Author's Note:**

> Destiel December Challenge 2020
> 
> Day 15: Lights
> 
> This is the last day of this challenge! It completes the main storyline that officially started on Day 2.
> 
> I am my own editor, any typos are my own. Feel free to let me know if something is in desperate need of editing ;)

***

Castiel lets himself feel all of the emotions that had been let loose from his time as a human. It’s a risk, even with everything that’s happened between him and Dean this past week, Castiel is well aware he could be setting himself up for disappointment. He just doesn’t have it in him anymore to resist the feelings pounding at his grace enforced walls. He wants to feel the joy at Dean making a room for him here in the bunker, for telling Castiel that he belongs here. He wants to feel the bubbly happiness at the absurd bee pillow on his bed, the swooping feeling of loving Dean more than he has loved anything for the entirety of his existence. Maybe he’s diving off a ledge with no ability to fly, but he refuses to stop every glorious feeling permeating his being as he drags Dean back to the Christmas tree. He gazes up at the doll version of himself propped up on top of the tree, takes in the Scooby-doo ornaments he’d brought home to make Dean and Sam smile, wrinkles his nose at the truly awful taste earlier Men of Letters had in décor, and indulges in a goofy grin at the lights he and Dean put up together. He dives towards the handful of presents underneath the tree and picks up two small ones carefully wrapped and garnished with curly ribbon. He pockets the smallest of the two, and turns around to press the larger of them into Dean’s hands. 

Dean fumbles with it for a moment. He staring at Cas the way they often stare at each other. A moment later and Cas sees the corner of Dean’s lip tick upwards, just enough movement for them to come back to themselves. Cas pulls at the sleeves of his pajamas nervously, urging Dean with a motion to open the present. Cas watches Dean’s nose scrunch up in concentration as he tries to pull apart the curly ribbon. Giddy with the rush of uncontained emotions, Cas rolls impatiently on the balls of his feet. Dean looks up in surprise.

“Dude, are you actually bouncing?” Castiel responds with his trademark stoicism.

“Of course not, Dean. Hurry up.” Dean rolls his eyes fondly at Cas and skips the ribbon to just tear off the paper. He lets the paper fall to the floor and stares at the small potion bottle as his brow furrows in confusion. 

“You want to tell me what this is, Cas?” Cas smiles, feeling almost giddy, and then looks boldly into Dean’s green eyes as they reflect the Christmas lights. 

“I would like to show you part of my true self. A part you can safely see with the aid of that potion.” Dean’s eyes sparkle, he’s clearly intrigued and Cas’ smile grows more confident. “It will give you partial access to otherworldly sight, similar to what many human psychics can see. With the dosage Sam and I measured out it should last for about a day. It’s somewhat variable dependent on your metabolism. If you decide to take it, I will meet you halfway and manifest a small representation of my true self.” 

“Um, okay. Will I have control over this sight, or am I going to be seeing trippy stuff all day?” Castiel snorts.

“Yes, you will have control to an extent. If something else were to work at manifesting you may see it, but most of this depends on me meeting you halfway. Born psychics tend to take years to see anything substantial, much less be exposed to visions.” Dean nods seriously.

“Any other side effects I should worry about?”

“Unlikely, unless you were to go on a hunt. It would make you slightly more aware of ghosts.”

“Alright, good enough. When do you want to do this?” Cas is nervous again for a moment, but silently redoubles his commitment to finding out where this will go. 

“Now, but we should go outside to the rooftop. I will require space for this. You may want to get a coat and your boots. I believe it is still snowing.” Dean passes the potion bottle to Cas with an eager grin, and rejoins the angel with his coat and shoes in record time. Cas feels his excitement build as he leads the man he loves to the rooftop where Sam had helped him work on this gift only days before. 

“Hey, look, there are lights up here too!” Dean gestures to the string lights propped up on tall stands around the edges of the rooftop. Castiel knows Sam must have put them up and wonders how Sam knew he’d end up doing this at night. Cas silently thanks his friend for the forethought. Dean follows one of the strands back to its source to find the on switch and suddenly the rooftop is softly lit with tiny imitations of the stars in the sky. Cas silently hands the potion back to Dean. It feels as if words aren’t needed in this moment, and Dean must feel it as well. He acts rather than speaking and throws back the potion as if it were a shot.

“Close your eyes, it only takes a moment to go into effect.” As Dean shuts his eyes Castiel pulls of his pajama shirt, draping it on one of the light stands. He inhales the sharp, cold, snow filled air and pulls on his grace. He breaths out as he shifts his much healthier wings further into the mortal realm, adjusting them to best fit his vessel’s frame. He turns away from Dean, too anxious to see his reaction right away. He keeps his wings close to his body, wanting to give his very human companion time to adjust slowly. Despite the shrouds and adjustments between him, the wings are still very much part of his true form and may be a bit overwhelming for a human.

“Can I look? Is it okay? I don’t feel any different.” Dean sounds almost disappointed, perhaps worried that the potion did not work on him.

“You shouldn’t feel different. You can look now.” Castiel hears a soft gasp behind him. “Tell me what you can see, Dean.”

“I – wow Cas… I see you. Your wings. They’re fucking beautiful.” Castiel hesitates for a moment, but allows the wondering lilt to Dean’s voice to sooth his doubts. He turns slowly to see Dean looking at him as if he’d never seen anything better in his life. This look, more than anything, undoes the knots of worry in the angel’s chest and he smiles broadly and unfurls his wings a bit, stretching them towards the stars. A rush of joy runs through his body as he takes in the awe on Dean’s face and the way he reaches out for Castiel without trepidation. Cas takes his outstretched hand and gently pulls him closer. 

“I can only make them partially corporeal here. Without the potion they have an impression here, the snow falls on them, I can use them as a shield, but you can’t see them except for a shadow. So, please Dean, tell me what you see. I want to know how much of me you can see.” Cas’ can hear his voice grow smaller with need as he speaks, but he can’t deny how much it means to share this small part of himself with the man he loves. 

“They aren’t just shadows anymore Cas. I can see individual feathers; I can see their color – I think. It changes. It’s uh, it’s hard to describe but they look like every color I’ve ever seen shimmering through the blackness of space,” Dean says breathlessly. He seems startled at his own description and laughs softly. “Damn, Cas, they’re so spectacular they’re making me sound fucking poetic. They’re amazing. You’re amazing.” 

Cas inhales sharply as Dean looks right into his eyes, something intense and warm in the way he seems to see more of the angel’s true self in his blue eyes than in the wings themselves. Before Castiel can define what he’s seeing, Dean’s eyes dart to his wings again. Cas notices his wings curling in towards Dean and halts them with a thought. Dean looks almost disappointed, making Cas grin.

“You can touch them. If you’d like.” It’s not a question, Cas can tell how much Dean wants to pet his wings. Cas is sure it must seem like an odd impulse to a human, to want to pet what appears to be bird-like wings growing out of an adult man’s back, but Cas wants Dean to touch him. He’s never had a human touch his wings before and he’s curious as to what it will feel like to have Dean’s fingers in his feathers. 

“Um, I won’t hurt you, right? I know that, er, birds winds can be fragile, I guess. I know you’re not a bird but they kinda look like -”, Cas cuts Dean off before he starts comparing him to a parakeet. 

“You won’t hurt me. Angels are warriors of God, and our wings were built to aid us in battle.” To illustrate this, Castiel raises his wings above his body, snapping them out all at once with a sharp ringing sound.

“Oh. Right. Yeah.” Dean’s eyes have widened at the intimidating display of the angel’s wings as they tower over him, but Castiel takes pity on him and softens his stance, bringing them back down. He curls them loosely at Dean’s side to give him easier access. Not one to hesitate when invited, Dean reaches out and gently brushes his hands through the feathers closest to him. 

“Cas… they’re so soft, and warm.” Dean begins to dig his fingers in with more confidence and chases the rainbow of lights reflecting off the obsidian black of Castiel’s wings. At Dean’s continued attention, Cas finds himself relaxing as he lets his head fall on top of Dean’s shoulder. Dean laughs happily. 

“I’m glad I could share this with you.” Cas feels strange but happy. He can’t quite describe what the newer emotions are pouring through him, but it is similar to the relief of coming home when you have been away for a very long time. He does manage to catch himself before he literally begins to purr, but he must have made some sort of sound because Dean ceases his exploration of Castiel’s feathers.

“Does it feel okay?” Cas manages to pull himself away from Dean just enough to see his face. 

“Yes, I’d imagine it’s like grooming.” Dean chuckles.

“Grooming? That wasn’t what I was expecting you to say.” Cas tilts his head to the side, trying to interpret Dean’s response. 

“Yes, tactile communication for comfort and bonding. The PBS special on primates said it’s called grooming.” At this point Dean is laughing hard enough that he bends over to try and catch his breath. 

“Yeah, hah, grooming. I think most people talk about it like that for the non-human primates though, Cas. But I don’t mind ‘grooming’ with you.” Dean smirks and Castiel is still not sure what is so humorous. Regardless, this is his gift to Dean and he is not done yet.

“Dean. Can I touch you with my wings?” Dean’s eyes widen just a bit but he nods his head in agreement. Castiel pulls his wings in and up until he is cradling Dean and they are in a shelter created by his plumage. Dean directs his gaze around the impromptu cocoon and runs his hand lightly over more feathers as they minutely shift in color against a background of darkness.

“Cas, you’re practically a planetarium. It’s like there are whole galaxies in here. I could look forever and never see all there is to see.” As this is one of the better human descriptions of angel true forms, Castiel feels content that he has shown the man he loves much more of what he really is. That Dean shows such quiet wonder at this glimpse of the heart of Castiel makes him feel safe to take another risk, one that means even more. He presses his wings in to bring Dean even closer, until their chests are almost touching. Cas pulls the smaller gift out of his pocket and lays it in Dean’s hand. Dean’s eyes are alight with curiosity as he peels off the paper. He shoves the crumpled paper in his coat pocket and lets the pendant that had been within drop, carefully holding the chain in his fingers. He squints at the pendant, a feather preserved on top of bronze, and then gasps.

“Cas. Is this – is it yours?” Castiel nervously raises his fingertips to Dean’s jaw and slowly raises his gaze to meet Dean’s eyes. 

“Yes. It does not retain all of its properties once shed, and it’s once of the smaller ones as it wouldn’t have been possible to make any of the larger feathers as conveniently wearable. It is still a part of me though, a part of my grace, of my true self.” Castiel pauses to make sure Dean understands. Dean’s heart is racing but besides that he seems to grasp the depth of this gift, so Castiel continues. “If you accept this, I can find you if it is with you. If you wear it, I can feel your life, hear your heartbeat. And the feather preserved inside the pendant will exists as long as I exist, no matter where I may be. If there is ever a real need it can even be used to locate me, although it will destroy the feather in the process. If you accept this, it will be part of you and no one else will be able to use it. Do you understand?”

Dean drops Castiel’s gaze to cradle the pendant in his hand, a bit of a dazed look on his face. Cas waits patiently, wanting to make sure this is Dean’s choice.

“Cas. I need to know something, because I don’t want there to be any miscommunication here.” Castiel waits for several minutes as Dean works to find the words he needs. “You say you’re giving me a part of yourself, that it will become a part of me. That sounds like, well, more than a friendship to me. And I’d like to know if I’m getting that right.”

While it’s not exactly a question, Cas understands that he needs to put this in more human terms. “Yes, Dean. You would be accepting that what we have is more than just friendship. I love you Dean. I am content with just being by your side, and if you do not love me the same way nothing has to change. However, these past days have allowed me to hope for more. So, I am offering you more. I am offering you me, if you choose to accept me.” Castiel’s hand has moved up to cradle Dean’s face, but he needs Dean to choose what he wants and does not move further. 

“Please don’t cry, Cas.” Castiel is surprised to feel tears drip from his face, he hadn’t realized just how much his emotions were spilling over. Dean wipes the tears away with his thumbs and then he leans in and kisses Castiel. 

Cas feels a rush of bliss and his grace warms his wings as he feels more feathers push into existence. He leans into the kiss and wraps his free arm around Dean’s neck as the hand cupping Dean’s faces slides up into his hair. Dean opens his mouth and Cas dives in, the sensation of their tongues touching better than anything Cas could have imagined, although Dean’s hands on his bare waist place at a close second. Too quickly, Dean pulls back to breathe and takes a small step back before Cas can drag him back for more. 

“Wait. Just a sec, Cas. Here, I want you to put this on me.” Cas’ eyes widen with surprise and joy, and he thinks that the kissing can wait for just a moment. He takes the chain and pulls the pendant over Dean’s head. Dean pulls his layers away from his neck just enough for Cas to drop the pendant below his undershirt to rest close to Dean’s heart. 

“I accept you Castiel.” Dean smiles, glorious in his choice, and his voice is saturated with love as a small flare of grace glows where the pendant hangs. Cas sighs as he can feel Dean’s heartbeat through the new connection, and he watches as Dean takes in the small change in feeling as well. 

“You can feel me? I wasn’t sure if you’d be able to.” Dean nods slowly as he presses his hand over his chest. 

“Yeah, wow. It’s nothing noticeable I guess, just this feeling of warmth. If I focus on it, it seems to get a little bigger, and I can tell it’s you.” Cas decides it’s time to get back to the kissing part as he feels he may actually be on fire with the amazing feelings coursing through him. Dean participates enthusiastically. Eventually though, Castiel notices that Dean is shivering, even with angel wings around him.

“Let’s go back inside. You should sleep for a while, so we can exchange gifts with Sam in the morning.” Dean frowns in response to this suggestion. 

“You said the potion would only work for a day. I want to see your wings for as long as I can.” Cas laughs at the pouting expression on Dean’s face as he grabs his pajama top and switches off the lights. 

“Well, I didn’t say anything because I wanted an honest choice from you without bribery, but when you wear my feather you should be able to see them anyway, especially since you said you can feel me through it. You may even be able to see them at times when they aren’t manifested in this realm.” Dean’s face is almost giddy at this news and Cas laughs again. Cas grasps Dean’s hand and this time he doesn’t protest as he’d led back into the warmth of the bunker. Cas takes a moment to push his wings away from the physical realm before going back inside. Dean continues to look behind Cas.

“I can still see them, more like shadows the way I’ve seen them before, or outlines of shadows, but maybe that’s just the potion.” 

“Only time will tell, but I believe you will retain the connection. I can manifest them inside later, so you can determine the pendants impact; I just have to be careful and keep them pulled inward.” Dean pulls Cas towards him and kisses him again, this time is softer, and almost hesitant.

“Come to my room? I, uh, I’m not asking for anything else tonight, but I was wondering if you’d be willing to just stay with me until I sleep? If that’s okay, I mean.” Dean stumbles over the words but Castiel is already tugging him in the direction of the bunker rooms. 

“I will watch over you when you fall asleep Dean, and I would enjoy doing that while sharing your bed. I would also like to try doing this in my new bed at some point. With my bee pillow.” Dean snorts and Cas smiles happily, wondering what he was so afraid of in the first place. When they reach the room, Dean closes the door behind him and strips down to his boxers, looking at Cas questioningly. Cas mirrors Dean’s actions and then joins him under the covers. 

“Cas?” Dean mumbles into Castiel’s chest sleepily.

“Yes Dean?”

“I love you too.” 

Castiel feels as if he’s flying again, damaged wings or not.

***

**Author's Note:**

> I will post a short epilogue in a day or two, just to wrap up some of the smaller plot points, but this was the main ending. Thank you so much to everyone who has shared this on tumblr, and left me notes, comments, and kudos. I appreciate those of you who have joined me on this one day prompt as it spiraled out of control. 
> 
> I have had so much fun writing this and I hope you all enjoyed my love affair with Castiel's wings (and of course I hope you all liked this version of Dean and Cas' love story).
> 
> If you liked this please check out my other fics or find me on tumblr (@arcticfox007)!


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